Not channeling anybody in particular
this time, unless it's Richard Armour...
Hello! Hello there, NSA. It's good to know you're there
I haven't got a lot to say, but you don't really care.
You just want to listen in on people when they talk -
And write down all their numbers while bin Laden takes a walk
I know it's lots of work to track me with your database.
I wish that I could be a much more interesting case
I don't know any people hatching plots in foreign lands
But I do hang out with people that Republicans can't stand.
I have a friend who's black. I have another who's a Jew
I know a couple gays. I know an immigrant or two.
I only know one Vegan -- she is quiet and reserved
That probably means she's up to something and should be observed.
I don't know any lunatics who want to maim and kill
But I have a friend named Mr. Smith who of George Bush speaks ill.
You'll probably want to check him out -- he says these things quite often
(Drag him to Guantanamo. Then his resolve will soften!)
As long as you've got records of each call that has gone through
I have a little favor that I'd like to ask of you.
You know I spoke the other day to friends across the sea.
I can't recall what I did say. Please read it back to me?
Hey, here's a thought, Dear NSA, that you might find of help
Why don't you start a business selling wireless phones yourself?
And offering a service plan for everyone to see
Where evenings start at Six PM -- and eavesdropping is free?
Here's to you, O NSA! Your dilligence I note.
I hope you catch some terrorists before it's time to vote.
Freedom for security - I guess that trade's alluring
But liberty for politics I find less reassuring.
Thank you thank you NSA! The job you're doing is fine.
But if it's threats you're after there are better phones than mine.
If you are after evidence of dangers to our nation
You really should be spying on the Bush administration.
Up next, a cancellation letter to Verizon in the form of an Italian sonnet...